Matt Cavenaugh was his name…. the coolest guy in the school. Everybody loved the guy…. girls and guys and when you’re in middle school, like I was at the time, you just want to be around a guy like that. He was awesome at soccer…. the best player on the team in fact…. awesome at basketball… got good grades etc, etc…. but as I look back on it now he understood something that no one else did. He understood that people were looking up to him… and he understood that he had an opportunity to be kind and to see the good in people around him. Maybe that was the biggest part of Matt that made him so much fun to be around. When everyone else would be trashing you, this guy would walk up and tell you something like “Bro you’re killing it…. great job!” I remember vividly the day that I scored 2 goals in a soccer game against our cross town rival. Several of the guys on the team didn’t like me very much… probably because at the time I exuded weakness, and it was easy to not like me then…. but after I scored my second goal they were all laughing at how “ugly” it was. Matt ran from the other side of the field and high fived me like I had just won the super bowl and what do you know??? They all SHUT UP!! BRASH optimism can actually silence negativity!
Time went on and I moved to Texas and lost track of Matt, but my first two years of high school were just as bad as my days in middle school in North Carolina. Then one day a thought occurred to me. What made Matt so cool?
I did an experiment my junior year in High School. Up until that point in my life I was pretty much forgettable. I decided I would make an attempt at “changing my stars” and trying to be the Matt Cavenaugh of our school. I wondered what would happen if I decided that I would talk to every single person I saw in the halls and tried to make them smile. What if I introduced myself to everyone and attempted to be encouraging to all of them? What would happen around me?? My first attempts were a bit awkward as i worked on the ins and outs of being an extrovert…. which i had never been before. After a while I started to notice a change in me and in the people that I was meeting…. they started knowing my name and even being happy to see me on a day to day basis. The more that I talked to people and became a source of optimism, the more that they wanted to talk with me… and a little at a time I started to be encouraged as they were encouraged. I found that being optimistic as a HABIT actually began to make me optimistic in BEHAVIOR.
Soon I was one of the more “known” people in the school… wether I was popular or not didn’t matter, people actually knew who I was and enjoyed the time that they spent with me… and honestly I began to rise in “popularity” as a result. It was crazy… before long I was on a first name basis with people who were in social circles I had never even thought about entering in the first place. The truth is that I was a believer and some people were turned off by that, but that didn’t mean that they didn’t know my name and consider me one of the more influential people at our tiny little school in Mount Pleasant, TX. Not only that, but because I was practicing talking with people all the time, I began to notice that I had an extra measure of strength internally when it came time to share my faith.
Now, to be honest, I didn’t become the person that I am today in high school…. no, I struggled with my own insecurities as much as anyone else did, but I found that part of leaving insecurity behind was the my internal belief that God had plans for me and that I didn’t have to be afraid of what other people thought of me. The more I practiced being an extroverted, encouraging, confident, kind hearted person… the more I became that person.
Who among doesn’t struggle with some form of insecurity, or self doubt?? NOBODY. Maybe the way to move away from these things is to begin to believe what the Lord says instead of consistently quoting scriptures as words instead of TRUTHS?? His words are TRUTHS… so believe them.
Matt Cavenaugh had a real and lasting impact on my life on a social level, and it was only after years of unconsciously practicing extrovert behaviors that I finally realized that I was simply forcing myself to live biblical principles the whole time. Now that I am the front man of BUILDING429 and worship pastor of GRACE COMMUNITY CHURCH I have found the power comes from practicing simple behavioral patterns coupled with living in light of the truth. It has made me a more confident leader. My pastor said in an email the other day that I was a “people magnet” which is hilarious because I am actually an extreme introvert based on every test that I’ve ever taken. Funny though, how God can take what is weak and feeble, and make it into a powerful influence for His kingdom. He can and WILL do the same thing with you if you will take Him at HIS word!!!
I want to finish this blog by asking you guys to chime in…… what are the scriptures that you remind yourself of when you get a bit discouraged that help you to remember that YOU WERE BORN TO LEAD THE WORLD TO JESUS!!
Here are a few of my favorites:
Psalm 139:13-16
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
Ephesians 1:13-14
13 And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, 14 who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.
2 Timothy 1:7
For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.
I COULD GO ON FOREVER…. in fact we should go on forever… what are some of your favorite scriptural truths that we all need to believe???
Hi Jason, I think if we were neighbors we could have bbq’s together! Often what you say resonates with exactly what I think or believe about a subject. I have a more behind the scenes job at church most of the time, but one Sunday a month I am the greeter at the front door. Beside welcoming visitors, I also try to compliment everyone that come in the door. It is amazing how one little remark can totally change someones’ attitude! Life can be tough, some days are better than others, but God is ALWAYS there no matter what. Giving a smile for no reason, remembering a visitors name or asking about a sick family shows that you care about that person. We should all have the same goal – to glorify God and share Jesus to the world – if our attitudes are sour, why would anyone else want what we have? Anyway, you asked for verses. As you know, my husband has been deployed and during the deployment my teenager daughter ran away. We also homeschool and live in an area with no family around other than our fabulous church family. With that being said, I get tired a lot. Some of my favorite verses are Isaiah 40:28-31 (NIV). Reading those verses reminds me that I am not alone, even when my husband is across the world and I feel alone. The Lord is always with me and will never leave me, even when the van breaks down at Myrtle Beach or the oven quits working and I have to fix it. Thankfully this deployment is over, but God’s truth still remains. Thank you for sharing what was on your heart and have a wonderful day!
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
1 Timothy4:12
Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity. Til I come, give attention to reading, exhortation to doctrine. Do not neglect the gift that is in you by prophecy with laying on of hands of the eldership. Meditate on these things; give yourseself entirely to them, that your progress may be evident to all. Take heed to yourself and to the doctrine. Continue in them, for in doing this you will save yourself and those who hear you.
-given a Spirit- given ability to teach and preach the gospel, the very resource needed to refute the false teachers and win people to Christ.
See you in Houston, Tx. Got my VIP ticket yeyy
Love this one… Wondered when someone would post it!! Awesome!
Love, love, love this one!! 🙂
Such wisdom! Keep going Jason! You and all of Bldg 429, your wives and kids are making such a huge difference. You started out encouraging my hubby and I and now encourage my 15, 13 and 10 year old. We’ve met you a few times along the way and have loved your concerts and music, but have totally loved the wisdom you offer beyond your music. Many blessings!
Jeremiah 29:11:
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
I know relates to Israel at the time of her exile, but its shows a caring God who comforts His people during a trying time. He never gives up and tells them that.
Wow! You know, that actually sounds a lot like me. Being a homeschooled teen, I’m obviously not personally familiar with the whole public school thing, but I’ve sure heard a lot about it…
I was actually extremely sheltered and had literally no friends until I was around 9. As a result…I was pretty reserved, and just naturally quiet around other people.
I had friends come and go and stay throughout this time, but I hardly ever got out to see them. That all changed when I started going to church…last year. I joined the youth group, but I always hung back over in the corner away from everyone else. It took me a good long time before I actually started to open up a bit. As I made great friends there (most of them were youth leaders at first), their positivity and confidence built me up. Before long I realized that God used these people to completely transform me into somebody better than I used to be. I’ve begun to reach out to others in a way I’ve never done before. God has used me to impact other people’s lives in such little time!
Now, instead of hanging out with the wall, you’ll see me walking around the church, talking to people, greeting them, and introducing myself. Just one year for that to happen…wow. One by one I was solving insecurities and opening my shell. Still am. I have a long way to go, but I’ve come far. I’m actually getting ready to join the worship band myself, but there’s a lot to work on!
I think that the scriptures that I hold closest and tightest are these:
Joshua 1:9
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
1 Corinthians 13:4
Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
The list does indeed go on, but these truths of God are what helped me most to overcome. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for me. I’m now praying for the courage to tell my story to this church. I believe He is leading me to it and I know it will impact someone…
Another great post. High five–you’re an overcomer too!!
(Can’t wait to see you guys with the Newsboys on Nov. 16! Super excited! This’ll be the second time seeing you guys since the free concert in May… XD)
One of my favorite scriptures that we should all keep with us is from Romans 8:34-39. “Christ Jesus, who died-more than that, who was raised to life-is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered sheep to be slaughtered. No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For i am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels or demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height or depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God and that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” This scripture really encourages me; especially the part about how Jesus Christ intercedes on our behalf. This gives me the courage to be open and trusting. It amazes me that I have the love of God no matter what. -Elizabeth
Great post Jason love reading your blog!
Hey Jason! so great, thanks for sharing! I too am an extreme introvert and am slowly learning how to be more outgoing. Even though I would love to stay cooped up inside myself, I know God wants me to reach out more. I’ve always been jealous of the people who were loved and respected by everyone and brought the light of Christ with them wherever they went. I was mad at God for not making me more outgoing until I realized that I had a choice. So this year I’ve been much more intentional about getting to know people and living out my confidence in Christ, and I’m amazed at the difference it’s already been making! So much of my shyness resided in my insecurities about being left out and rejected, that I didn’t think anyone cared if I said hi or even if I was there. But once I started asking God to kill those lies, I realized that like you said, EVERYONE struggles with insecurities and I shouldn’t let that hold me back. It was preventing me from being the woman of God that He made me to be. And when I don’t think I can do it, I turn back to my life verse, which is Exodus 4:10-12:
But Moses said to the Lord, “Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue.” Then the Lord said to him, “Who has made man’s mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak.”
I’ve never had a strong voice, so this verse reminds me that if God wants to use me then it doesn’t depend on my own strength. He will give us the power and courage to live outside of ourselves and reach more people than we ever thought possible!
2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
I am an introvert as well. I do enjoy time with people, but I find that I need time to recover afterwards. When I start to think that maybe I’m just not good enough, I remember that verse and take those negative thoughts captive.
Jason,
At church the other night this was shared – Psalm 121
1 I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills,
from whence cometh my help.
2 My help cometh from the LORD,
which made heaven and earth.
3 He will not suffer thy foot to be moved:
he that keepeth thee will not slumber.
4 Behold, he that keepeth Israel
shall neither slumber nor sleep.
5 The LORD is thy keeper:
the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand.
6 The sun shall not smite thee by day,
nor the moon by night.
7 The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil:
he shall preserve thy soul.
8 The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in
from this time forth, and even for evermore.
What a great reminder of who we are in service of each and every day. As an elementary school principal, I have days when it is easy to forget who we are in service for. However your messages that have been shared on You Tube and through this website give me strength to serve God’s children in a way that would dignify his name. Thank you for your strength and wisdom to share with others.
2 Timothy 1:7 is one of my favorites and one that I used all the time when I was forcing myself to step out of my social anxiety disorder and get out into the world. All my life the SAD kept me so afraid of people that I almost hated people. My teen years it got very bad and by the time I was 20 I left my house only twice. I was trapped in my home and getting out around people terrified me. But I knew that God had not given me a spirit of fear so I stepped out in faith and just put “One foot in front of the other…” and God did the rest. Stepping out of our comfort zones and walking by faith opens up the door for God to move in our lives like nothing else can! God has brought me so far but I still want to go farther! Can’t be content to stay as is. We need to be growing all the time! Thanks for posting this! It was great and I needed to hear it! Matt sounded like an amazing person. I hope he grew up to live like that as well. And good for you for stepping out and doing what you did. I am an introvert too and know how hard that can be!
Jason,
Here are a couple of my favorite verses. Zephaniah 3:17
The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.
I have many favorite verses. Phillipians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
I am an introvert, I still struggle with going up to people to talk with them. Thank you for sharing this blog with us, I always enjoy reading what you have to say. I love how honest you are. I am alright when I am at work, I serve people every day at the coffee shop that I work at. I have been working for almost 25 years with customer service.
Matthew 11:28-30
28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden , and I will give you rest .
29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Regardless of what you are going through, God has this in HIS plan. We need to make sure that we surrender our ENTIRE lives to God. Consistently search for what he is trying to show you. Do you need to put something on or take something off? Make sure you take the time to pray, but also to listen.
I had the privilege of hearing your band for the first time at Winter Jam in Columbus Ohio. It is amazing to see how your journey has progressed. Your ministry is truly a blessing to my family….Kaylee (my 3 year old) loves Where I Belong. When she hears the music in the car she makes a point of telling us to raise our hand for Jesus. Thank God for the talents he has given you and your band to encourage and bless so many others.
Awesome blog, Jason. I am naturally an introvert, but working in customer service/retail forced me to come out of my shell. Performing on stage as a singer helped as well. I was never shy to sing infront of a crowd, but speaking was another story. I love your band’s music and look forward to hearing your new material.